Thursday, November 24, 2016

Bihari saya

BIHAR की dictionary*

Woman -ओरतिया

Father - बाबू

Mother - मइया
Wife - मौगी

My Husband - फलना के बाबू

What - आंय

Why - काहे

Hey Dude - का बेट्टा

Whats up - का करे ही रे

Done - हो गलो

Not done - ना होलो

Let him go - जाय दे सार के

I dont know - हम का जानिओ

Smooth - चिक्कन

Resolved - भे गलो

Slapped - हउक देलउ

Get lost - भक्क

Stay here - हिंयैं रह

Now - अबही

Not now - अबही ना

Never - कहियो ना

Friend - दोस

Come here - ऐन्ने आव

Go There -  ओन्ने जो

Same to same - एक्के जइसन

Sunlight - रौदा

Salt -निमक

Bag - झोरा

Gate - केवाड़ी

Leg - गोड़

Finger - अंगुरी

Ox - बएल

Rat - मूषो

Small rat - चुटरी

Cat - बिलाईया..

Tuesday, November 22, 2016

How will i wash it

एक नवविवाहित जोड़ा बर्तन की दुकान में झगड़ रहा था।
.
.
.
पत्नी- "ये वाला स्टील का गिलास लो”।

पति- “नहीं, ज़रा और बड़ा गिलास लेंगे” !

दुकानदार- “साहब जी,
महिला दिवस भले ही चला गया है,
लेकिन मैडम जो कह रही हैं, वही गिलास ले लीजिए ना”..!!!

पति -“अरे यार..
तुम्हें बेचने की पड़ी है..

इस छोटे से गिलास में मेरा हाथ घुसता नहीं है,
मैं इसे माँजूगा कैसे ???”😬😁

😂😋😂😋😂😋😂😋

Sunday, November 20, 2016

Note of rs. 100

अर्ज़ किया है

यूँ ना खींच मुझे अपनी तरफ
बेबस कर के,
ऐसा ना हो के

खुद से भी बिछड़ जाऊं
और तू भी ना मिले...

*भावार्थ*👇

यहाँ कवि को ATM की लाइन से, दूर पड़ा एक 100 का नोट दिखाई देता है, कवि सोच रहा है, नकली हुआ तो नोट भी गया, लाइन भी...

Tuesday, November 8, 2016

Cholley Chaat

The Menu at a Dahi Cholley Chaat Shop

1) Chaat--Rs.10
2) Special Chaat--Rs.12
3) Very Special Chaat--Rs.15
4) Extra Special Chaat--Rs.18
5) Double Extra Special Chaat--Rs.20
6) Sunday Special chat--Rs.25

To check each and every chaat for its different taste, Ramu started eating everyday a different one...
But soon he discovered that each and every one had the same taste of chaat.
Finally one day he asked him the reason for the same taste?

Chatwala said :
chaat cost...Rs.10
Special chaat means spoons washed...
Very special chaat means spoons and plates both washed...
Extra special chaat means washing hands before putting chaat
Double extra special chaat means clean drinking water is provided seperately...
Chaatwala now looking at Ramu face...
Then he asked What is Sunday Special?
Chaatwala said: Sunday...I take bath...!!"

Monday, November 7, 2016

Focus

Teacher: Who is the President of Iraq?

Johnny : I dont know Miss?

Teacher: You need to focus more on your studies

Johnny : Please Miss, Can I ask you a Question?

Teacher: Yes..

Johnny : Do you know Angela?

Teacher: No, Why?

Johnny : You need to focus more on your Husband.

Saturday, November 5, 2016

She is taller than you

Wife : Honey, If I die, would you get married again?

Husband : No dear...

Wife : I am sure, You would.

Husband : (Get Annoyed)... Okay I would

Wife : Would you let her to sleep in our Bed?

Husband : Yah.... I guess so.

Wife : Would you let her wear my clothes?

Husband : No, She is taller than you.